Lawrence I. Miller CHT C.I.
If it was up to our conscious minds, we would have EVERYTHING we wanted. Do you have everything you want? Most of us don't because the conscious mind is not control, as most of us believe. We can, however, regain control of our life. The conscious mind is good at basic things, such as reading, writing, math, and daily life. Our conscious mind identifies our daily wants and needs and arranges for us to have those wants and needs fulfilled. But, our conscious mind becomes frustrated when, having identified those needs, it is unable to fulfill them. You may identify this as self-sabotage, inability to have what you want, addictions, unreasonable fears, doubts and etc.
The subconscious mind runs the show, and it does so from backstage! As children, we make interpretations and decisions about events taking place in our lives. The subconscious mind stores them, and makes decisions, as a protection mechanism, or makes them part of our belief system. Although, originally intended to protect us from childhood circumstances, they stay with us into adulthood.
While the subconscious is wide open as children observing events and storing decisions and interpretations about life, it is increasingly less accessible as we age. By the time we are adults, the doorway to the subconscious is closed and locked. Meanwhile, the subconscious mind continues to direct the show, oblivious to the fact that we are no longer children, needing childhood protection mechanisms. The subconscious continues using those protections and beliefs to keep us from getting hurt and having what we want.
As adults, these protection mechanisms and beliefs become unwanted behaviors, blocks, conflicts and liabilities.
The conscious mind may know something is wrong but has no idea of the source of the problem since there is no direct communication between the conscious and the subconscious mind. The conscious mind then gets busy, focusing on external circumstances, trying to rearrange things in an effort to fulfill its perceived needs and desires. Frustration and disappointment are the results. The conscious mind is out of control, and; it knows it.
So, while your conscious mind may not remember, for example, you were emotionally abused by a parent screaming at you constantly as a kid, your subconscious remembers it and may have programmed in a protection mechanism to create shyness or some other unwanted behavior.
Your conscious mind can struggle forever to over-come a unwanted behavior in your real world, but it will lose as long as that protection is stored in the subconscious mind. The best you can hope for is to have your conscious mind force yourself to be somewhat assertive in trying to get what you want. Your life is out conscious control.
As long as you are consciously trying to figure out what the problem is you will never solve it.